On Street Harassment

via pinterest 

I love the summer and have been whining all through the winter waiting for the sun to come out. I am such a summer person. Even when it's hot, humid, and sweaty, I still prefer it to the winter. I love how easy it is to throw on a dress or shorts and a t shirt, not having to put on three layers to leave the house (and immediately start sweating when back in the warmth). But easy summer outfits mean showing more skin, which would be fine with me if this didn't result in a huge increase in street harassment. 

I remember when I first started getting attention from men on the street. I was eleven or twelve. At this point I was always pretty excited for someone to be saying they thought I was attractive. The excitement wore off quickly, and as I got older my reactions would depend entirely on my mood. Sometimes I would find it funny to wave or nod flirtatiously, sometimes I would give them the finger. Now it's always the finger.

While it would still be despicable, I think I would be slightly less disgusted if the end game of the men who honk and holler at me was to get in my pants. At least there is some sort of goal or purpose there. But no, the majority of men who honk or yell to women they pass know it won't get them anywhere. It isn't a compliment, it's a way of saying you are here for my entertainment. Your worth is measured in how much I want to bang you. No matter how you react or what you do, I will still see you as a sexual object. 

I'm sure that many of these men would say that they're just playing around, deny these hidden messages. And many of them would probably believe what they were saying. We're so used to these behaviors being the norm, and I'm pretty fucking tired of it.

Too frequently I hear women being blamed for the reactions they get to their bodies. If you didn't want the attention why did you wear that? you knew what to expect.. Women are taught this every day. From school dress codes to rape blame, women are being told that their bodies are always sexual, and are their responsibility to keep hidden away. 

I don't show my body the way I might want to because it isn't worth it to me. It isn't worth it to be harassed everywhere I go. It isn't worth it to be told it's my fault, that I look like a slut. I don't want to hear that I'll obviously get a sexual response because my body is a symbol of sexuality. My body can do so many things, sex is such a small part of that.

If you've experienced street harassment (and if you're a female reader I feel almost certain that you have ) I would love to hear your thoughts, and how you choose to handle it.

If you want to read more about this, I recently read an amazing post on truthfully, and would also urge you to check out hollaback!, an online project aiming to end street harassment.